Slapped

牙签

2011-02-20T20:26:00.001+08:00

牙签在英语是什么?

fair or not

2010-07-19T15:06:00.003+08:00

life's not fair. but then again, what ever is? (2 mark)

ks

2010-07-15T17:57:00.002+08:00

What does the term "KS" in gaming represent?
A. Kill-Steal.
B. Kerja-Sama.
C. Kasi-Saya.
D. None of the above.

gula gula

2010-07-06T14:43:00.003+08:00

Gula-gula apakah yang anda patut belanja kawan? (2 markah)
A. Gula-gula manis
B. Gula-gula pedas
C. Gula-gula pahit
D. Gula-gula masam

couple vs single

2010-05-19T12:37:00.000+08:00

Who would you tackle? One who is in a relationship or one who is single? (2 mark)
A. Single.
B. In a relationship.
C. Neither.
D. Both.

so hawt (female ver.)

2010-05-13T01:49:00.001+08:00

BF : That chick, look! she's so hot. Why can't you dress more like her?

What do you do now? (2 mark)
A. Don't talk to him.
B. Don't talk to him.
C. Don't talk to him.
D. Don't talk to him.

happy mother's day

2010-05-09T00:54:00.001+08:00

Mom : You know what day it is? It's mother's day. What are you going to do?

What are you going to do? (No right answer, only best answer)
A. Bring her to dinner.
B. Buy her a gift.
C. Give her a kiss.
D. Nothing.
E. A, B and C.

so hawt

2010-05-05T13:13:00.008+08:00

GF : Look at that guy, he's so hot. Why can't you be more like him?

What do you do in this situation? (2 mark)
A. Don't speak.
B. Defend yourself.
C. Be pissed.
D. Say something witty.

the more the merrier

2010-04-30T23:34:00.002+08:00

Anonymous : 4 wheels(car) is faster than 2 wheels(motorcycle), correct?

Anon : Ya.

Anonymous : Then 3 wheels(tricycle) must be faster than 2 wheels(motorcycle)!

Beat the logic.

feels good man

2010-04-26T22:25:00.002+08:00

Anonymous : I feel pity for the beggar, therefore I give him money. In return, it makes me feel good in the heart.

Anonymous : I feel pity for the prostitute, therefore I give her money. In return, "it" makes me feel good in the... well...

shit excuse man.

where did the rm50 go?

2010-03-31T22:43:00.004+08:00

Day 1 - Borrowed RM50 from Bill Gates (Promised to return after 5 days)
Day 5 - Borrowed RM50 from Madhatter (Promised to return after 5 days)
Day 6 (5 days due) - Returned Bill Gates his RM50 (Madhatter's RM50)
Day 10 - Borrowed RM50 from Brother from another mother (Promised to return after 5 days)
Day 11 (5 days due) - Returned Madhatter his Rm50 (Brother from another mother's RM50)
Day 15 - Borrowed RM50 from Ronald McDonald (Promised to return after 5 days)
Day 16 (5 days due) - Returned Brother from another mother his RM50 (McD's RM50)
Day 20 - Borrowed RM50 from Ironman (Promised to return after 5 days)
Day 21 (5 days due) - Returned McD his RM50 (Ironman's RM50)
Day 25 - Borrowed RM50 from KFC uncle (Promised to return after 5 days)
Day 26 (5 days due) - Returned Ironman his RM50 (KFC's RM50)
Day 30 - Borrowed RM50 from Bill Gates (Promised to return after 5 days, again)
Day 31 (5 days due) - Returned KFC his RM50 (Bill Gate's RM50)
[new month, rinse and repeat]

poor

2010-02-22T22:19:00.002+08:00

i'm so poor that my car only have 2 doors.

mkt vs mkn

2010-02-12T17:40:00.002+08:00

him : Going for marketing ar?
-pause-
me : I'm going for makan-ing.

him : What? Going for marketing lah?

me : Makan-ing.

him : Ohhhhh....

makan-ing > marketing

fei gei

2010-02-02T10:29:00.003+08:00

her : Write it down for me.

me : Wait lah. I'll do it for you later.

her : I want it nao!

me : Tired lah. I just got down from "fei gei".

her : You "ta fei gei" got lah. That's why so tired!

thats from my grandma. facepalm.jpg

很好！

2010-01-22T14:36:00.002+08:00

他：我都不知道她有什么好。

他2 ：嗯。嗯。

他3 ：一点都不好。

他4 : 她好啊。她很好。你知道什么好吗？“好（乔）婆”那个“好”。

一流

gentlemen 2

2010-01-17T11:48:00.002+08:00

anon : There is nothing on the tv but football, football and more football. Come, let's go furniture shopping.

lolwut

gentlemen

2010-01-13T20:37:00.007+08:00

her : Hey honey, am I fat? Do you think my thighs are fat?

him : Baby, yes you are. You are fat. Your thighs are fat. But that's the way I like it. Come, let's have dinner.

apparently the radio says this is what a gentlemen should say. gentlemen never lie.
this is my version >> click <<
i guess i'm a gentleman.

it about taimm fer a update

2010-01-10T15:02:00.002+08:00

我：不要读书了，我们来打机。

他：不能。

我：死读书是没有用的。

他：那应该怎样？

我：你现在是读死书。学我，读书死，一定能。

他：去死。

ps2 taiim!

2009-12-16T22:11:00.002+08:00

me : Woi! Put in WWE CD lah!

him : Wait lah.
-points @ cd-
me : Put in "here comes the pain" or here comes the pain!
-points @ cd-
him : If you bising lagi i will shut your mouth!

i loled.

face problem

2009-12-11T22:50:00.002+08:00

me : Why my ice cream always melt geh!?

him : Face problem lah!

me : No wonder lah! I'm so hot that my ice cream melted.

him : ...

hensem

2009-11-15T17:25:00.001+08:00

2009-11-12T19:41:00.000+08:00

size?

2009-11-09T00:41:00.000+08:00

wave

2009-11-05T01:45:00.002+08:00

ahh!! ignored

interruption

2009-11-02T00:50:00.003+08:00

umbrella

2009-10-29T00:39:00.001+08:00

phone number

2009-10-27T20:37:00.002+08:00

parfum

2009-10-20T16:56:00.001+08:00

her : Hey, do you wear perfume?

me : Yes.

her :Really? I don't smell any.

me : Come closer.

- closer -

me : Closer.

- guess what happened -

rain (alternate)

2009-10-18T02:41:00.003+08:00

her : Oh no, it's raining. I hate the rain.

me : Why is that?

her : It makes me all wet.

me : It's ok. I wouldn't mind seeing you wet.

her : ...

birthday

2009-10-16T21:07:00.003+08:00

me : Happy birthday dude.

him : Thanks. Where's my present?

me : Well, I'm present here. That is your present. Get it?

him : Ahaha..Of course, of course.

MIA..damnnnnnn

rain

2009-10-08T00:09:00.001+08:00

her : Agh. I hate the rain.

me : Why is that?

her : Because it makes me wet.

me : Really? I like the rain.

her : Why?

me : Because I get to share an umbrella with you.

her : ...

dinner or not

2009-10-05T17:47:00.002+08:00

he : Ugh. I'm going to puke seeing this.

him : There goes my dinner...

me : Ha! don't worry my friend. I haven't puke yet. You can still have your dinner.

him : wat?

chemistry or physics

2009-09-29T21:09:00.002+08:00

me : Have you ever wonder why girls prefer chemistry while boys prefer physics?

him : Not really.

me : Well, that's because girls like the chemistry where boys like it physical.

him : Ooooo. Well, I can't deny that.

time to wake up!

2009-09-26T23:44:00.001+08:00

him : I wake up every morning after the chicken goes cock-a-doodle-doo.

me : That's because you have cocks in your house not chicks!

him : What?

me : Start acting straight. Bring chicks home, not cocks!

PUNS~!! Gotta love'em.

free meal

2009-09-24T00:21:00.001+08:00

her : Let's go for a meal. My treat.

me : No thanks.

her : But it's on me. My treat!

me : Alright then.

her : I thought you didn't want to go?

me : Well, You want to treat me for a meal. I guess I'll go to make you happy.

i'm getting fat. wut'cha think?

2009-09-21T00:03:00.001+08:00

him : Damn, I don't know how to answer when my girl ask me whether she is getting fat or not.
him : The truth hurts if I say yes but I can't lie to her by saying no. Dilemma!

me : Never lie to your girl. I know I won't.

him : Then you're going to say yes if you were in my situation? Don't you think it's harsh?

me : Just tell her this, "Hey, you really are getting fat. That must mean I'm treating you so well, I feed you enough and never let you starve!"

him : I'm so going to use this next time!

me : I told you I never lie didn't I.

The truth doesn't hurt. If you know how to say it right.

feeeeeed me!

2009-09-18T17:33:00.002+08:00

him : It's not fair, why do I have to suffer by eating bread to feed her steaks and fillets?

me : Well, you feed her to make her fat, so nobody would touch her.

him : If that happens I wouldn't want her either.

me : Then you continue to suffer by eating bread to feed her diet pills. It's a cycle.
me : Seems fair, don't you think?

him : ...

somebody is "urined"

2009-09-16T21:21:00.002+08:00

him : I'm so piss off.

me : Why what happened?

him : I don't want to talk about it. Talking bout it makes me even piss.

me : Well, I'll tell you this.
me : Getting pissed off is better than getting pissed at, literally.

do you want to get piss off or piss at by me?

yellow? who's there? yellow? yellow?

2009-09-14T17:44:00.002+08:00

[some talk about cancer week later]

she : Do you have anything yellow that you can donate? Anything yellow would be fine.

him : Well, I don't have anything yellow with me.

me : The only only thing yellow he have is his mind.

she : Uhm...oooookaaaaay......

i feel so bad for saying that =(

did'cha miss me? 2

2009-09-11T00:27:00.001+08:00

me : Hi.

her : Hi. Miss me?

me : No.

her : Aww..

me : This time I'm able to took a shot at you. I didn't miss you.

her : Sweet. When did you take it? In my shower? Show me!

me : Sorry no. It's for my personal collection.

drama~~!!

did'cha miss me?

2009-09-08T17:26:00.002+08:00

me : Hello.

her : Hi. Miss me?

me : Well, yes. I tried to shoot you, and I missed.

her : Aww..that's so sad.

me : Why so negative? I shoot with a cam, not a gun.

her : Really? That's sweet.

rockets n stars

2009-09-06T01:25:00.003+08:00

[ inappropriate conversations ]
me : Wow, you seems to know a lot eh.

him : Well, practice makes perfect.

me : I guess I've been practicing on the wrong stuff then.
me : You're like the astronomer, you know a lot. I'm like the astronaut, I get all the action. If you know what I mean.

him : Sure I do. But the astronaut rides the rocket and the astronomer sees the stars.
>rocket = pen0r, see the stars = reach orgasm<
me : O shi-.

him : You can ride my rocket anytime! Hahahahahahaha.

He's goooooood. I got served.
If you don't know what he meant you know too little, kids.
If you like to find out, highlight(ctrl+a), cheers.

greetings

2009-09-04T15:41:00.000+08:00

me : Hey! Long time no see.

her : Hi.

me : Still looking as pretty as ever.

her : Geez...

me : ...
me : This is the part where you say " You too, still looking handsome".

her : ...

blog is back, cheers

hello dear

2009-08-27T16:59:00.002+08:00

she : What do you call a deer that cannot see?

me : A blind deer?

she : No.

me : A deeeeeeeer?

she : No.

me : What is it then?

she : No idea.

- I laughed -

numbers

2009-08-25T19:46:00.002+08:00

me : What did zero said to eight?

her : I don't know.

me : Nice belt.

her : Wha.....

nice belt yo.

long time no see!

2009-08-22T17:50:00.002+08:00

me : Hey, long time no see!

her : It's not that long. Didn't we saw each other few days back?

me : Really? Feels like forever to me. I missed you already.

her : Well, not me.

me : Ouch!

filtered water

2009-08-20T19:44:00.000+08:00

me : Why the waste of money on textbook?

him : Study, doh!

me : Textbooks are like unfiltered water, it contain a lot of minerals and even more impurities, this is why textbooks have a lot of useless information inside.
me : Where notes are like filtered water, it only contain minerals and no impurities, everything you need is inside. This is why I never buy textbooks.

him : But the notes are useless.

me : That is because the filtered is too damn good. It even filtered out some of the minerals.

Money spent on me is money well spent. money spent on textbooks is not.

找吃，找吃！做吃，做吃！

2009-08-17T00:25:00.000+08:00

我：我给钱你，不是要你站在那吃东西，是要你做工！

她：他们说，找吃，找吃，一路找一路吃，所以才叫找吃。我也一样，一路做一路吃。我在吃着。

我：你找我吃，所以才叫找吃。我在吃着，你快去做！

她：扫把在拿来！我要扫你出去！

我老爸找，我吃，所以他们才叫找吃！你也一样！

honey

2009-08-15T15:31:00.000+08:00

her : Your mouth is so sweet.

me : Why, thank you. As sweet as what, may I ask?

her : As sweet as honey.

me : If I'm the honey, then you must be the bee.

her : There you go again.

lol, sweeeeeet.

adoption vs birth

2009-08-12T00:12:00.004+08:00

me : It's better to have an adoption than to have your own kids.

him : What? Then you won't love your own kids, it's not your own flesh and blood.

me : Well, you're going to suffer when they don't listen to you.

him : That's part of parenting.

me : If I adopt, I can always say "you're not my real child, if you don't listen to me, I will throw you out". That will make them listen to me.

him : When you're old, they will say "you're not my real dad, if you don't listen to me, I will throw you out".

me : That is why we have EPF.

him : ...

what do you think?

till death do us part

2009-08-10T00:13:00.001+08:00

her : Did you send it up yet?

me : What if I said no?

her : Do you want to die?

me : Well, to die by your hands and the last thing I see is you. Sure, I'd die happy.

her : You really should die.

I prefer to live though..

water bottle

2009-08-07T23:24:00.003+08:00

him : Those who keep answering the teacher's question in class is like a half empty water bottle. When you shake it, it makes alot of noise.

him : Those who don't answer the teacher's question is like a full water bottle. When you shake it, it makes no noise.

me : An empty water bottle makes no noise too, and that's you!

him : Same goes to you.

me : Oh?

An empty bottle refers to no knowledge at all, where a half empty bottle refers to half-knowing( know of a little but act like a know-it-all), full bottle is full of knowledge. Forgot to put this in.

Guess which bottle am I.

lady gaga

2009-08-05T22:00:00.001+08:00

her : How do you wake lady Gaga up?

me : Uhh, by going gugu gaga?

her : Lol, no.

me : Then?

her : You pok-er, pok-er, pok-er face.

me : Lol.

Gotta love lame jokes!

pretty face

2009-08-03T01:15:00.000+08:00

him : Are you free?

me : No.

him : What are you doing?

me : Helping her with her assignment?

him : Can't you say no? Why must you help?

me : How can I say no to a pretty face like hers?

him : ...

me : Don't tell her I said that.

I'm a sucker for girls. Screw my life.

lock

2009-08-01T01:06:00.001+08:00

her : Why do you turn off the engine everytime you pump petrol?

me : Just a habit.

her : Must you also lock the car doors even when I'm inside?

me : Yes, so I can have you all by myself. Others can't get to you.

Remember boys, turn off the engine and lock her inside the car when you pump petrol!

slow driving

2009-07-29T20:05:00.001+08:00

her : Why do you drive so slow?

me : Because I'm a safe driver, obviously.

her : Yeah, right.

me : Ok fine. I drive slow so I can spend more time with you.

her : ...

drive safe, drive slow.

sushi

2009-07-27T21:32:00.001+08:00

her : What did sushi A said to sushi B?

me : Uhh, hi..?

her : Nope.

me : Then?

her : What's up B!

me : Wazzup!

purr

2009-07-25T00:13:00.001+08:00

me : Hey, look at that cat, it's sitting using it's butt!

him : What?

me : What what?

him : You never saw a cat sitting before?

me : Cat sits on it's legs, not their butt!

him : What? So are you saying you sit on your legs?

me : No, but cats do.

him : I don't want to talk to you.

Cat sits on it's leg!

cold

2009-07-22T18:18:00.001+08:00

me : I'm cold.

her : Then bring a jacket.

me : I was hoping for you to give me a hug though.

her : Go dai!

day dream

2009-07-20T00:14:00.001+08:00

her : Hey, what are you doing? Day dreaming?

me : No, I was thinking about you.

Still thinking!

chubby

2009-07-17T20:41:00.000+08:00

her : Er-hem.

me : Here.

-stares-

me : What? Not enough space for you to go across? You're not that fat.

her : Well, I actually gained a few.

me : It's ok. I don't mind a little bit of fat.

her : Tell that to somebody else!

Blog is dying...It's hard work to be lame...help!

cut

2009-07-14T22:05:00.005+08:00

her : What is that on your arm?

me : Well, I'm so in love with this girl that I carved her name on my arm.

her : It's in banana(Chinese)! You can say anything you like!

me : It's true!

I can see my arm hair from here!
and picture is not in widescreen(16:9), omg!
somebody messed with my camera!
LX3

hearts™

2009-07-12T17:41:00.000+08:00

Hearty hearty night
Paint your palette blue and grey
LX3

trickery

2009-07-09T22:52:00.002+08:00

her : Girls never feel safe when they're with you.

me : Why?

her : Because you flirt alot.

me : I won't flirt if I have a girlfriend.

her : I doubt so.

me : Well, there's only one way to find out. Want to try it?

she : Stop tricking her into your trap.

Busted!

black n white

2009-07-06T17:23:00.003+08:00

him : When I was young, I get all A's in art. My drawing skills, No. 1.

her : Oh? Then why didn't you give my an opinion when we choose the color for the wall?

me : Because back then, it's black and white.

him : Hahaha, good answer!

Cheers, I'm back.

civic™

2009-07-04T17:56:00.005+08:00

vroom vrooom
admiring afar
he wish he can drive
LX3

heartless

2009-07-01T22:36:00.001+08:00

her : why are you so heartless?

me : Well, my heart is with you. That's why I'm heartless.

her : ...

secret

2009-06-28T12:53:00.004+08:00

her : What is a secret?

me : If you want to know what's a secret, I'll show it to you next time.

her : How are you going to show it to me?

me : It's a secret.

- next day -
- give her a kiss -

me : There, that's a secret.

un/fortunately for me/her, the next day didn't come. And it is no longer a secret.

goodnight

2009-06-25T17:22:00.000+08:00

her : It's so late, aren't you going to sleep?

me : Nop.

her : Why?

me : So I can say goodnight to you.

importance

2009-06-22T20:52:00.001+08:00

me : What does HUC stands for?

her : Help Uni Coll.

me : Oh wow! I didn't know that. I didn't know my own coll!

her : How can you not know?

me : Well, I can't remember that many things. I need to remember your name instead of Help's. Your name is more important.

perfection

2009-06-19T16:04:00.008+08:00

me : Perfection is achieved, not when there's nothing more to add, but when there's nothing left to take away.

him : It's so deep. I don't get it.

me : Let me give you an example.

him : Ok.

me : A perfect girl, is achieved not by giving her the face you like, the body you like, and the personality you like.
me : But, it is achieved by removing the face you dislike, the flat chest you dislike, and the personality you dislike. You end up with nothing more than just a vagina.
me: PERRRFEECCTTT...!! HAHAHAHA!!!

him : ...

I'm not that kind of guy..really..

high and low

2009-06-17T21:42:00.001+08:00

her : When you were small, you used to measure how high you are by marking the wall. The higher the better.

her : Now, it's time to measure your penis marking the wall, the lower the better. It's going the opposite direction now, it's a cycle.

I'm lost for words. Hoho, I just love talking to her.

my balls 2

2009-06-14T15:02:00.000+08:00

me : Wow, it sure is hot today.

-walks to the kitchen-

mom : If it is hot, take of your cloths.

her : But there's nothing to see on top.

mom : Take off the pants then.

me : Why? So you can check out my balls?

her : I promise I won't touch it. I would just open my mouth and eyes widely, like this.

me : You don't have to give such a big reaction. It's not like you never see them before.

her : True, I saw your balls till I'm bored with it.

me : But it is not green.

my balls 1

2009-06-12T10:14:00.001+08:00

her : Hey. What's this? Are those your balls?

me : No.

her : Hey, your balls are green in color.

me : My balls is not green in color.

her : Hey look at me, massaging these balls. So that is why it turned green. Your balls are shocked by me touching them.
her : You don't have to giggle you know, you can just laugh. We both know what you are thinking.

I just had a conversation about balls while I was eating!

sweat

2009-06-09T20:11:00.001+08:00

her : switch on the fan, I'm sweating like mad.

me : Why are you afraid of sweating? You're not wearing see-through.

her : Oh? You want to see it? I can take it off now if you want to see it.

Speechless again.

scars

2009-06-06T21:11:00.002+08:00

her : Why do you have these scars?

me : These are manly scars.

her : No, these are kinky scars. You like it when your girlfriend whips you dontcha?

She made me speechless. She's good.

fingernails

2009-06-03T19:32:00.001+08:00

me : Oh, my fingernail is out of shape.

her : I didn't know you care about these kinda things. Let me see.

me : Sure I do. Here, my middle finger.

her : What! Hey sis, your son just showed me something obscene. He showed me his middle finger!

me : I have to care about my fingernails, else people won't take it seriously when I showed them my middle finger!

lazy

2009-06-01T00:13:00.001+08:00

her : Go up and I'll show it to you.

me : Don't need to. I already know what you are going to show me.

her : Oh yeah? You are just to lazy to move your ass.
her : Your son keeps thinking that I'm dumb.

mom : She consumed more salt than you have consumed rice my son.

her : Yeah, I also excreted more salt than you have excreted rice. Hahaha.

my dad, my manufacturer

2009-05-30T20:14:00.003+08:00

dad : Hey son, get a cloth and clean the table.

me : Ok.

her : Only you are capable of making him do something. He told me, in order for him to move, you must insert money into him.

me : He is the manufacturer. He is able to make me move without inserting money.

dad : Hahahaha.

sad

2009-05-28T00:19:00.002+08:00

me : I'm sad. Are you sad?

him : No.

me: I'm Single, Available, Desperately. I'm sad, are you?

him : ...
him : I'm Sa-. Single, Available. Without the D.

I'm sad, please make me happy. Yeah, you.

flowery mouth

2009-05-25T20:11:00.001+08:00

him : I pity your future girlfriend.

me : Why?

him : Because you're so "flowery mouth". And " flowery mouth" equals "flowery heart".

me : No. Since I'm "flowery mouthed". That means my mouth is the flower and my heart is the stem. Which makes it "thorny heart".

him : Oh, I liked that.

me : Sure you do, you're as "flowery mouthed" as me.

My "thorny heart" is like a durian, tough and thorny on the outside, soft and sweet on the inside.

blush

2009-05-22T00:39:00.001+08:00

her : Are you praising me? If you do that, I would be shy.

me : You look good when you blush, that's why I praised you.

her : DIE!!!

me : Blush more please.

還記得嗎?

cold heart

2009-05-19T01:48:00.001+08:00

him : Why does she like to go against you so much? Aren't you sad?

me : Of course not.

him : Don't be ashamed to admit. I won't laugh.

me : My heart is as cold as ice when I'm with her. No matter what she tries to do, it won't penetrate it.

him : No, you're just heartless.

driver

2009-05-17T01:30:00.001+08:00

me : Hey mom, can you drive me to -censored-?

mom : Get yourself a 'Ahmad" like the rest of the people then you can get him to drive anywhere you want. I'm not your driver.

me : They have their "Ahmad" to drive them around, I have my "Ah ma" to drive me around!

mom : ...

Gotta love my mom =). I forgot to say happy mothers day to her this year. D=

mothers day present

2009-05-15T15:30:00.006+08:00

mom : It's mother's day today, what are you going to get me?

me : Tidy up my bed for me and buy me breakfast.

mom : What?!

me : It's my present for you for mother's day, to make you feel like a mother.

mom : Get me a cane so I can cane you, that will make me feel like a mother!

My present for my mom last year =). A smile from her heart, priceless~

name

2009-05-13T15:09:00.001+08:00

-msn-
me : Hey, help me with this.

her : The one you're looking for is unavailable

me : Who are you?

her : I'm his sister.

-some boring talk later-

me : Can you send me back the file using your email please?

her : Ok.

me : To tell you the truth, I don't need that file. All i wanted is your email and your name.

-I logged off-

This is for Henry!

gambling

2009-05-11T22:27:00.004+08:00

-gambling session-

me : You know, I was gambling few days ago.

them : You always gamble.

me : And I'm losing like hell!

them : Serves you right.

me : I suspect they're cheating, so I look under the table, like this.

-looks under-

me : Why aren't any of you wearing skirts?!

shut up

2009-05-09T00:04:00.001+08:00

-conversation-

her : Don't tell anyone about it!

me : Sure, put something in my mouth to keep me from talking.
me : I only accept your lips.

She didn't give it to me, not that I want it. It's the wrong lips after all, if you get what I mean.

one hand

2009-05-06T23:34:00.006+08:00

her : Oh, you really drive with one hand.

me : Yeah, so I can do this.

-touch her lap-

her : DIE!!!

Red is for MU. This is for U.

^
Mouse hover here!

construction

2009-05-04T18:20:00.008+08:00

I won't be updating for awhile until further notice.
New title =)
New layout =)
Still having some tweaks here and there to fix. (Comment section is down)

5th May, Comment section is up, tweaking some other parts now.
Click on the Slapped banner to bring yourself to the main page. (This page to be exact)
4 of the buttons below the banner also worked.

6th May, Brought the main page up.
Added a "Home" button.

girls

2009-05-02T14:12:00.001+08:00

him : What is your preference in girls?

me : Don't have any.

him : No way! There must be something. I don't care what you say, just give me any preference.

me : Well, girls with glasses I guess.

him : Why?

me : Because when I take their glasses, they won't be able to find me.

Not really a preference of mine. But, yeah, it makes a good joke! Maybe..

fattie and hottie 2

2009-04-29T20:55:00.001+08:00

me : Theres another reason why they're together.

him : Which is?

me : Imagine this, what would happen when the hotty found out the fatty is cheating behind her back? Obviously, she'll chase him and he'll run. But half way through, he'll run out of breath(again). The hotty wins.

him : That's just backwards of what you just said.

me : It's also another reason.

fattie and hottie

2009-04-27T00:07:00.001+08:00

him : I just don't get it! How can a guy like him get a girl like her?!

me : Well, what do you think?

him : Money! He must be loaded!

me : What if I tell you it's not money?

him : No Way!

me : Imagine this, when the fatty found out that the hotty is cheating behind his back, what would he do? He'll chase her of course. And then? She'll run! What happen then? He'll soon run out of breath and she escaped!

him : Woah!

No wonder I'm still single! Fuck!

money on the floor 2

2009-04-24T12:08:00.001+08:00

me : If I don't pick it up, somebody else would. Correct?

him : Yes.

me : And that would result in 2 possibilities. 1, he keep it for himself. 2, he hand it to the authorities. Correct?

him : Yep.

me : Which means he is able to choose the path between heaven and hell, depending on the choice he make.

him : True so far.

me : If I took the money, I too have 2 choices. But if i choose to hand it in, the police would make the choice I just made. To keep it to himself, or to return it to the owner.

him : Correct.

me : If I choose to keep it to myself, the other guy or the police won't have to make the choices, which mean they will not sin, they will be going to heaven, but I did. In other words, I sinned for the good of the people! For you!

him : Go to hell!

me : Yes I am!

money on the floor

2009-04-22T12:47:00.001+08:00

him : What would you do if you found money on the road? Any sum of money.

me : It goes into my pocket of course. Free money!

him : What? How could you? You're going to hell!

me : Finder's keepers!

him : How could you justify yourself?!

me : If I don't pick it up, somebody else would. I don't want to take the risk of getting others to hell.

him : But there's a possibility that they'll hand it to the police, if it's a big sum.

me : I'm not taking the risk.

him : What?

What would you do? Can you justify your act?

toothpaste 2

2009-04-19T23:48:00.000+08:00

him : So, how about you, Damian?

me : The middle part!

him : Then she would say,"But I use the back part, don't you think it's a waste if you don't use the back part?"

me : Because you used the back part! There's nothing left for me to use at the back! That's why I use the middle part!

him : ...

me : Wahahahahaha!!

toothpaste

2009-04-17T00:34:00.002+08:00

him : So, assuming you have a girlfriend and she asks you which part of the toothpaste you use, what would you answer? The tip(nearest to the cap)? The middle? Or the back?

me : Stupid question! Who would ask that kind of question?!

dude : Hmm, I would answer the front part.

him : Then she would say,"But I use the middle part, don't you think it's a waste if you don't use the middle part?"

dude : ...

me : Like I said, stupid question!

So, which part of the toothpaste do you use?

stranded on an isle 2

2009-04-14T16:28:00.001+08:00

dude : Tell me, why would you bring someone that hates you to a stranded island with you?

me : Because she once told me, "I will not accept you unless you're the last person on earth".
me : Guess what? I'm now the last person on earth. What are you going to do now?
- evil grin -

dude : Oh wow! I didn't think of that!

Don't make the mistake of bringing someone you love to a stranded island with you.

stranded on an isle

2009-04-12T20:22:00.001+08:00

dude : Which girl or women would you like to be stuck with on a stranded island?

me : Hmm, a girl? Any girl?

dude : Yes. Your soon to be girlfriend? Your target perhaps?

me : Girlfriend? I don't think so.

dude : Then? Who would you bring?

me : A girl who rejected me once.

dude : What? Why in the world would you bring someone that hates you?

me : Because I'm not like you.

So, who would you bring along to a stranded island with you?

airport

2009-04-09T00:43:00.001+08:00

her : How are we going to get there?

me : By car, of course.

her : How about we go there by plane?

me : You're not an airport(flat chest), where am I going to land a plane?

her : ...